friday night

i don't know what to do with myself.
the baby went to bed early.
leaving me to twiddle my thumbs starting at 6 30. i cleaned up dinner. changed the flood lights on the front of the house. drained the swimming pool -well, helped dry out the puddles is more like it. scrubbed the stove. washed and dried a load of laundry.
sigh.
friday nights around here aren't what they usually are.
i was going to rent a movie off the tv. settle down with some popcorn and the rest of my pepsi(i wish it was coke. i couldn't get to the coke. in order to get to the coke i would have had to a) leave my baby sitting in the buggy while i hopped over to the next checkout stand and dug one out of the cooler or b) lost my place in line by dragging the whole buggy over there so as not to leave my kid unattended in a public place. so i settled for pepsi. it's just not the same.
but watching a movie alone is never any fun. it just makes me feel more alone than i really am.
tj has called 3 times this week.
we only managed to talk one of them.
monday the gave everybody 3 minutes to use the phones.


yes that's right..... i said 3 minutes.


they handed out random cell phones to groups and made them all share. by the time tj got his turn there was next to no battery left so our 3 minutes phone call was really more like a 45 second "i love you and i'm good and i can't talk b/c there's no battery but i didn't have long anyway. are you doing good? yeah i'm fine too. i gotta go babe. i love you!"

it sucked.

wednesday night they gave everyone 15 minutes of phone time AND gave them their personal cells back to use! but TJ was in the middle of doing his leadership training(i'm still not sure what all that entails) so when he actually was able to call he managed to get out a few words and then i hear someone yelling in the background "1 minute! 1 minute left!" and it was another rushed "i have to go but i'll try and get some more time and call again.i love you!"

finally thursday night he calls and he has a full 15 minutes to talk! and he has a bad signal!
GIVE ME A FRIGGIN BREAK WILL YA!!!!!!
we only lost eachother once though. i just couldn't hardly understand him most of the time. but he was there. living and breathing on the other end of the phone. and it was enough.

we are half way done. as of yesterday he will be home in exactly one month. i can do this.